Dear Life

by My Altamont

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1.
What's the matter with your heart these days Is it bruised and battered, caged and tattered, oh no All I know is I brought it dow-ow-ow-ow-own Every morning I count the ways I made you sadder, and I left you shattered, oh no And now it all comes back arou-ow-ow-ound We cannot undo what we got Like a bullet from a gun I shot And when you say that you hate me it's just love and affection And maybe we should have some more between us And when I say that I hate you it's just love and affection Or maybe that's just taking the easy way out There's a problem with the way I think Yeah, every little thing's a catastrophe And I keep fucking up my life You don't relate to anything I say And you wouldn't even listen even if I stayed We would never make it out of this alive We cannot undo what we got Like a bullet from a gun I shot And when you say that you hate me it's just love and affection And maybe we should have some more between us And when I say that I hate you it's just love and affection Or maybe that's just taking the easy way out My heart's black and blue from all of this abuse And I push everything on you Separate to save ourselves from our own guts The only thing that we can do And when you say that I hate you it's just love and affection And maybe we should have some more between us And when I say that you hate me it's just love and affection Or maybe that's just taking the easy way out Maybe that's just taking the easy way out I know we're just taking the easy way out
2.
Most astronauts aren't sleeping With the TV on again, they have friends Other astronauts don't mark time With suicide attempts, they go revolutions They're happy men with goals and jobs And lists of accomplishments Being back on Earth ain't all it's Cracked up to be, there ain't much left of me Most days I pace the floor and Look for something true, it's all lies since I lost you Feel like a castaway from outer space Locked away from everything I know what I do is wrong but I've been doing it for so long I don't even really know how to get along You don't have to give me a break I've fallen every step of the way Each and every step of the way Down gravity's staircase Other astronauts, they all see The divide between, and I feel unclean Those astronauts before me Are back in their routine, I let my muscles atrophy Organs won't acclimate to gravity It all feels so heavy I know what I do is wrong but I've been doing it for so long I don't even really know how to get along You don't have to give me a break I've fallen every step of the way Each and every step of the way Down gravity's staircase Down gravity's staircase
3.
I used to keep my privacy On a three and a half inch diskette I typed all the lyrics out So that I could keep them to myself Later on I'd stay at home Soon enough I'd settle for less Put together an Ikea desk I started typing lyrics on my phone It started with a pity party, yeah And in the end I wasted, I wasted my whole life It started with a pity party, yeah And in the end I wasted, I wasted my whole life I just can't stop fucking up I don't focus on what counts the most The other day I crashed my car The other day smashed by bedroom up I'll tell all about it next week When I see you for the last time Every day's the end of the world It doesn't matter how it came to be It started with a pity party, yeah And in the end I wasted, I wasted my whole life It started with a pity party, yeah And in the end I wasted, I wasted my whole life
4.
There's been an accident But is it relevant You looked out your back window Everything covered in snow Poison hemorrhaging from a leak It must be about me me me Me me me Crawling on all fours Up to your back door Just then, the telephone That's me, I'm all alone Poison hemorrhaging from my head You know I'm better off dead dead dead Dead dead dead You've been having the greatest day And I just keep pushing you further and further away Your cold, cold cough I hear it through the line I guess it's a bad time I guess it's a bad time I guess it's a bad time I guess it's a bad time
5.
Sad Summer 03:03
First take my meds Then go back to bed The rest of my day Is all in my head I could take the turnpike Someplace with sunshine No one wants to see me They think I'm a landmine I'm a lowly worm I crawl upon the earth I'm a lowly worm I crawl upon the earth Every day I get dumber I've had a fucked up summer I paid the phone bill but nobody's calling She said, I got a beach crew And it don't include you And I've heard enough cries for attention She said we could talk Out on the hot hot sidewalk I went back inside And stared at the clock When she finally got there I was up on a chair She said I was no fun And I should just hang there I'm a lowly worm I crawl upon the earth I'm a lowly worm I crawl upon the earth Every day I get dumber I've had a fucked up summer I paid the phone bill but nobody's calling She said, I got a beach crew And it don't include you I've heard enough cries for attention I was sad, sad, sad, sad, sad, sad this summer

credits

released November 8, 2019

My Altamont is:
Chris Tull - vocals, guitar, bass

on these recordings, he has been joined by:
Corey Meyers - drums
Sandra Bullet - backing vocals
Chris Trace - guitar solo on My Whole Life

Written by Chris Tull.

Recorded March-June, 2019 at Habitat Studio, West Deptford, NJ by Chris Tull.
Mixed at Habitat Studio by Chris Trace and Chris Tull.
Mastered by Chris Trace.

Cover painting by Abi Bash.
Layout and design by Chris Tull.

Thanks to: Andrea Cometz, Corey Meyers, Jaime Parker, and Tim Balch.

Special recognition: Chris Trace. (Astounding skill, thankless dedication, bleeding ears.)

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My Altamont New Jersey

This is Chris Tull from Erotic Novels, the Hellstroms, etc. I make melodic punk rock for you.

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